This page consists the IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Answer Band 6 with Examiner feedback which will help you understanding the tactic to solve the IELTS Writing Task 2 Questions.
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Write about the following topic:
Some people believe that politicians have greatest influence on the world, while some believe that scientists have greatest influence on the world. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience to back up your answer.
Write a minimum of 250 words.
Sample Band 6 Answer
Influential personalities always try to contribute, in a positive manner, for the betterment of society. One side of doctrine states that the politicians serve more influence as they run the countries; whereas, others believe the scientists through their inventions and advancements produce more impact on the world.
On the one hand, perhaps one of the crucial role politicians play is the upbringing and development of a country. That is to say; they are one of the main tiers of politics, which help the country to economically and financially grow. At the same time, they make sure to take essential measures for the sovereignty of the country. Therefore, people mark them as an admirable source to tackle with their work politics and home economics. For example, different levels of diplomatic relations among politicians over the world are being taught at many working organisations to set an explanation of how to deal diplomatically. However, the exposure of influence is only confined to inter-relation and economics.
On the other hand, scientists are considered as source inspiration due to their higher intellect and IQ level. In other words, by the help of discoveries and inventions at various fields, they hold a stronger influence on the people of the world. For instance, inventor of Microsoft software is regarded as a role model for the career-oriented individuals. Moreover, because of their inventions from basic home devices to industries, their contribution along with its influence is more remarkable.
In conclusion, although people appreciate politicians in the fields of economic and diplomatic relations, the various developments done by scientists make them more impersonated by the people.
(265Words)
This is the answer is written by the real student who appeared on IELTS exam and got band 6 for this answer. now, let’s us look forward to the essay feedback given by the IELTS Examiner.
Examiner Feedback
“Personalities”? How does the introduction help the reader? TA – you write a positive paragraph about politicians and an equally positive paragraph on scientists. Are these your views? You give your opinion in the conclusion but where do you explain your view? The use of ” impersonated by the people.” is confusing// CC – there is a sense of development in the writing// LR – there is largely appropriate vocabulary but the way you combine words does not create much strong collocation// G – articles are faulty and some verb patterns are incorrect. There is nothing terrible about the grammar but your use of vocabulary makes some sentences difficult to read (“people mark them as an admirable source to tackle with their work politics and home economics”???)
So, I’d say:
//TA – 6
// CC – 7
// LR – 6 (7 is possible)
//G – 7
//Overall = 6.5 (7,0 if you are lucky).
Well, this are the essay sample for band 6. Mero IELTS consists other information too regarding IELTS Writing Task 1, IELTS Listening, IELTS Reading, IELTS Speaking. Below are the some links to the page which might be useful to a student.
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