This page consists the IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Answer Band 7 with Examiner feedback which will help you understanding the tactic to solve the IELTS Writing Task 2 Questions.
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Write about the following topic:
Without a shadow of a doubt, playing video games has become prevalent in adolescents.This essay will discuss both the advantages and disadvantages associated with this practice.
Include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience to back up your answer.
Write a minimum of 250 words.
Sample Band 7 Answer
First, let us discuss the benefits that the playing virtual games has on the juveniles.
The most prominent is, children playing these games have certainly boosted their knowledge in latest technologies such as computers, mobiles and so forth.To illustrate, a recent survey depicts that most of the software developers have a common thing in them that they are video games enthusiast since their childhood. The other positive implication that might be seen in children is that they can spend most of their time at their homes.which help their parents to properly look after them.
On the other side, the unfavourable ramifications of playing video games cannot be overlooked.First and foremost, these games have engaged children for many hours in a day.which consequently arise many health ailments such as poor eyesight, obesity and so forth.For instance, developing as well as developed nations are facing a problem of child obesity, as toddlers spend most of their free time in playing computer games.The other negative implication that these games have on children is poor academic performance, which can easily be seen on their report cards.
To conclude, the trend of playing video games has some advantages and consequences on the other side.Parents should restrict the amount of time their children spend in front of a computer to gain only the advantages of video games.
(218Words)
This is the answer is written by the real student who appeared on IELTS exam and got band 7 for this answer. now, let’s us look forward to the essay feedback given by the IELTS Examiner.
Examiner Feedback
This isn’t an authentic question, is it? where is it from please? Why have you changed the meaning of the question in the introduction by replacing “children” with “adolescents”? TA – you deal with the question but in a very general way Why do computer games result in “poor academic performance”? The conclusion is ‘weak’ for a typical T2 but the wording of the question doesn’t help you// CC -I suppose this is 4 paragraphs? Organisation is logical and there is both coherence & cohesion (but not much)// LR – good use of collocation but probably not enough evidence of less common, but appropriate, examples for a really high band// G – I’ll assume the few punctuation errors are typos. Slightly too many minor/careless errors (including with articles) to deserve a really high band. Is there sufficient evidence of the ability to use complex sentence patterns? Clumsy in places.
So, I’d say:
//TA – 6
// CC – 7
// LR – (8? – “have a common thing in them”??)
// G – 7
//Overall = 7.0.
Well, this are the essay sample for band 7. Mero IELTS consists other information too regarding IELTS Writing Task 1, IELTS Listening, IELTS Reading, IELTS Speaking. Below are the some links to the page which might be useful to a student.
- What is IELTS?
- IELTS Writing Task 1
- IELTS Essay Evaluation Online Free
- IELTS Writing Task 2 Recent Questions
- IELTS Mock Test British Council
- Overall Band Score Calculator
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