This page consists the IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Answer Band 7 with Examiner feedback which will help you understanding the tactic to solve the IELTS Writing Task 2 Questions.
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Write about the following topic:
In many countries, old or traditional languages are dying out or being forgotten, especially by young people. Is this an acceptable development which occurs inevitably, or is it something which we should try to prevent?
Include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience to back up your answer.
Write a minimum of 250 words.
Sample Band 7 Answer
Globalization is probably being causing extinction of long-established languages in many nations, especially affecting youngsters. Acceptance and prevention of this seem to be a controversial idea, and this essay will discuss both of them with a conclusion.
On the one hand, it can be said that lost of the traditional linguistics would lead to cultural and traditional values loss. By this we mean that any old language appears not only a true reflection of the civilization, but also promotes that inherited custom values. This can be seen in Pakistan where a minority language Sindhi recognized as a true image of Indus Valley culture, diminishing rapidly in urban areas. Furthermore, the supporters of historical languages often point out the possible manipulation in a nation’s history, which can be as a result of translating history into modern languages. Thus, all of this indicates the need to preserve and promote the local mother tongues.
The other side of the debate is that the globalization perhaps makes the universal language a pressing demand of young nation. If a person has to get education in international subjects such as International MBA program, he would have to acquire English language skills to meet admission criteria. Another factor often claimed by proponents of one international language is mobility in employment, which requires the employees to have a specific language in addition to native one. Arabic language, for instance, as an additional language most of the times demanded by Arabian employers.
To conclude, it appears that the objective of conventional languages is admirable; however, these might not be choices of youth, who are inclined to the languages spoken at global level due to vast career opportunities.
(275Words)
This is the answer is written by the real student who appeared on IELTS exam and got band 7 for this answer. now, let’s us look forward to the essay feedback given by the IELTS Examiner.
Examiner Feedback
An awful introduction in terms of paraphrase – sorry. TA – a good answer but not a particularly strong conclusion// CC – there is a sense of development in the writing and evidence of effective use of cohesion// LR – good use of collocation but not always natural word choice (vast career opportunities/ inclined to the languages spoken at global level)// G – the first sentence is the weakest part. There are minor slips throughout the essay ( that lost of the traditional linguistics/that the globalization perhaps makes the universal language a pressing demand of young nation). Notice the basic error here – “If a person has to get education in international subjects such as International MBA program, he would have to acquire English language skills” . Take care with articles too
So, I’d say:
//TA – 7
// CC – 7 (might slip to 6)
// LR – 7
// G – 6 (to many minor errors)
//Overall = 7.0 (6..5 if you are unlucky). You don’t write in a particularly natural way.
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