This page consists the IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Answer Band 7 with Examiner feedback which will help you understanding the tactic to solve the IELTS Writing Task 2 Questions.
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Write about the following topic:
The money spent on space programmes would be better spent on vital public services such as schools and hospitals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience to back up your answer.
Write a minimum of 250 words.
Sample Band 7 Answer
Money expenditure on space programmes has recently become a topical issue. It is argued that this money should be channelised towards more beneficial community sectors, such as health and education. In my opinion, I completely agree with this proposition because it has more positive and practical implications.
The main reason why I argue that money spent on space industry should be directed to health and education is that it will have a direct impact on general public. Since people pay taxes to the government in order to get good health and educational facilities, so wasting these tax revenues on impractical activities such as spaceship would be injustice to people. For example, India and North Korea are two countries which are spending a substantial sum of money on nuclear and space programmes, while 50% of their population is impoverished and has been living below red line. People of such countries do not have access to basic health and education facilities. It is therefore potentially unwise to spend a huge amount of funds on such useless activities as spaceship.
Although some people consider that more budget for aeronautical affairs could result in excellence in this field, which may improve country’s image all over the world. This is however, not a practical idea. For instance, a billion-dollar space project of USA failed in 2013. Had this money been invested in improving the infrastructures such as schools, colleges and hospitals, this would have benefited the masses in real sense. Hence, space industry does not deserve to be invested in.
To conclude, it seems to me that instead of wasting financial resources on space programmes, they should be rather dedicated to community projects which could benefit individuals in real life.
(282Words)
This is the answer is written by the real student who appeared on IELTS exam and got band 7 for this answer. now, let’s us look forward to the essay feedback given by the IELTS Examiner.
Examiner Feedback
“channelised”? TA – you answer the question well but it is simplistic to say “space industry does not deserve to be invested in”// CC – good use of cohesion// LR – “Money expenditure” & “channelised” prevent 9. In fact, the intro is the weakest part of the essay in every respect// G – you use a range of complex grammar patterns and the writing is virtually faultless, But continually omitting articles has to limit the band. It;s only the article weakness that is preventing 8+
So, I’d say:
//TA – 7
// CC – 8
// LR – 8
// G – 7
//Overall = 7.5.
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