IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Answer #189

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This page consists the IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Answer Band 7 with Examiner feedback which will help you understanding the tactic to solve the IELTS Writing Task 2 Questions.

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Write about the following topic:

being celebrity such as famous film star or sport personality brings problems as well as benefits.
do you think that being a celebrity brings more benefit or more problem?

Include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience to back up your answer.

Write a minimum of 250 words.

Sample Band 7 Answer

Famous iconic stars; actors and sports personalities, received a lot of advantages through their work, but face problems as well. Despite having no privacy is the biggest issue faced by celebrities, I believe financial security is the main factor that outweigh any problem.

The main disadvantage of living a celebrity lifestyle is lack of privacy. Due to extreme amount of following, a famous star is remain under the newspaper’s highlight, where his personal life style being discussed all the time. In order to get business electronic and print media make stories and keep on discussing their private life. For example, Imran Khan, a famous sports icon, remained under scandals during his whole professional career and being judged by society all the time negatively. However , I believe that this is the minor issue that could be regulated as monitery consideration has prime importance in anyone’s life.

Financial stability is one of the biggest benefit that is brought by fame. This is because successful sportsmen and film stars earn a lot of money in their short career, whereas any other profession such as doctors and engineers could not earn that much in their whole life. Being able to buy anything or travel anywhere because of high amount of salaries, results a sense of secured future among famous celebrities. For example, Justin Bieber, a renowned musician is earning more than enough at an early age that no other academic professional of his same age could reach there.

To conclude, remain in limelight around the world, results in no private life, is the main problem faced by stars, I believed that they earn more than enough amount of money during their short careers that undermine any issue faced by them.

(284Words)

This is the answer is written by the real student who appeared on IELTS exam and got band 7 for this answer. now, let’s us look forward to the essay feedback given by the IELTS Examiner.

Examiner Feedback

What is the purpose of your introduction? How does it help the reader prepare for the rest of the the essay? TA – Where do you clearly answer the question “more benefits or more disadvantages”? The conclusion is confusing because “undermine” has a negative connotation so the reader has to think carefully to understand what you want to say// CC – para 3 is really good// LR – this area is borderline. There is evidence of collocation but it isn’t particularly strong. It is good to see that you make use of carrier nouns// G – you use some complex grammar patterns but almost every sentence has a grammar error, some of which are very noticeable (a famous star is remain under the newspaper’s highlight, where his personal life style being discussed all the time/Being able to buy anything or travel anywhere because of high amount of salaries, results a sense of secured future among famous celebrities)

So, I’d say:
//TA – 6 (a bit generous?)
// CC – 8
// LR – 7 (just)
// G – 6
//Overall = 7.0 (6.5 wouldn’t surprise me).

Well, this are the essay sample for band 7. Mero IELTS consists other information too regarding IELTS Writing Task 1, IELTS Listening, IELTS Reading, IELTS Speaking. Below are the some links to the page which might be useful to a student.

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Hi! I am Rupesh Dahal. I'm a mid level WordPress Developer, SEO Analyst, Blogger & Web Designer from Nepal. Currently, working as content writer on Mero IELTS Inc.

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