This page consists the IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Answer Band 7 with Examiner feedback which will help you understanding the tactic to solve the IELTS Writing Task 2 Questions.
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Write about the following topic:
Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience to back up your answer.
Write a minimum of 250 words.
Sample Band 7 Answer
Whether more money should be allocated on railways or new roads be constructed by the government will be discussed thoroughly in this essay.
Among some circles it is believed that new railways should be built and the old one should be maintained. They argue that doing so not only encourages people to use public transportation thus making contributions to decrease environmental pollutions including green-house gases emitted by burning fossil fuels by personal cars but also saving a huge amounts national budget otherwise spent on maintenance of roads which tends to be much higher than those of railroads. For instance, the United States of America in which most of people drive to work, the environment is nowhere near as clean as it is in Japan, whose people prefer public transportation over personal ones.
On the other hand, other people oppose the idea, contending that every single person deserves the right to choose the way he/she travel whether it is personal cars or trains and metros and reckon that railroads cannot be a substitute for roads this soon. For example people in USA believe that they have to walk long distances from the metro stops to work unless they travel by their own cars, resulting in wasting much time.
In conclusion, I strongly support the idea of building more railways and metros which helps conserves the precious resources such as energy thus helping our blue planet to stay clean and green and allowing reverse the damages we, humans, have done to it.
(247Words)
This is the answer is written by the real student who appeared on IELTS exam and got band 7 for this answer. now, let’s us look forward to the essay feedback given by the IELTS Examiner.
Examiner Feedback
I don’t see anything wrong with the introduction. But a thesis statement would help. TA – you make the common error of not making or explaining your view until the very end. What is your response to the points you discuss in para 2 & 3? The topic could be discussed in considerably more depth. Surely trains are for transport between cities while cars are mainly used for transport inside a city? Is the metro a railway? You need to define what you are writing about (eg say you will include light railways in your discussion// CC – only 2 sentences in para 3? The writing flows// LR- personal cars /reckon/this soon? G – “also saving a huge amounts national budget otherwise spent on maintenance of roads which tends to be much higher than those of railroads. For instance, the United States of America in which most of people drive to work, the environment is nowhere near as clean as it is in Japan, whose people prefer public transportation over personal ones.” This section is why I have to limit the band. Can you see why?
So, I’d say:
//TA: 6 (a little strict?)
// CC – 7 (the potential to improve)
// LR – 7 (close to 8?)
// G – 7
//Overall = 7.0. You write well.
Well, this are the essay sample for band 7. Mero IELTS consists other information too regarding IELTS Writing Task 1, IELTS Listening, IELTS Reading, IELTS Speaking. Below are the some links to the page which might be useful to a student.
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- IELTS Essay Evaluation Online Free
- IELTS Writing Task 2 Recent Questions
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