This page consists the IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Answer Band 7 with Examiner feedback which will help you understanding the tactic to solve the IELTS Writing Task 2 Questions.
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Write about the following topic:
Some believe that unpaid community service should be compulsory part of high school programmes(for example working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children.To what extend do you agree or disagree?
Include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience to back up your answer.
Write a minimum of 250 words.
Sample Band 7 Answer
People’s opinions differ as to whether or not high school curriculum should make helping the community as a mandatory aspect of education.I am of the wavelength that such a work should be a compulsion for the younger generation.
Firstly, a coursework like this helps adolescents to commune with their society and this acts as an instrument in creating a feeling of ownership.By engaging in these activities young people gain hands on experience which goes a long way.As a stark example, the culture of old age home is prevalent now in all parts of the world.If tender minds get a chance to work here they would get sensitise to this issue and would grow as adults who donot abandon their parents.So, the above example clearly shows the need of free societal work for students.
In addition to this, foundation of relationships are laid which makes individuals feel that they are accepted by the society.The inner happiness that is attained by making a change in somebody’s life cannot be achieved by any worldly things.For example,if a renowned sportsperson starts training kids of his neighbourhood he would get more respect and love that boosts self confidence and gives a feeling of achievement.Not only this,such work experience helps in dealing with situations later in professional life as one has the skills to deal people. Thus after analysing, it is evident that introducing volunteer work for students is laden with multiple benefits.
As the discussion reveals, making students do free work for community will not only help children to grow but even the society.I hope governments the world over encourage such a trend.
(265Words)
This is the answer is written by the real student who appeared on IELTS exam and got band 7 for this answer. now, let’s us look forward to the essay feedback given by the IELTS Examiner.
Examiner Feedback
3 different types of error in the introduction that will make the examiner extra vigilant. TA – a strong answer. Perhaps you could discount possible arguments against the proposal// LR – why begin para 2 with “Firstly”?// LR – I totally agree with Aash. You are trying too hard. ” The inner happiness that is attained by making a change in somebody’s life cannot be achieved by any worldly things.” – is this religious writing or an essay? I don;t think a native speaker would use ” laden with multiple benefits.” and “kids” in the same piece of writing// G – as Aash points out, there are word formation errors (which is penalised under G, not LR). ” Thus after analysing,” – what’s wrong with this?
So, I’d say:
//TA – 7 (“if a renowned sportsperson starts training kids ” – relevant?)
// CC – 7 (why not 8+?)
// LR – 6 (there is collocation but there is a lot of inappropriate language. You could get 7)
// G – 7
//Overall = 7.0 (should be 7.5 with care).
Well, this are the essay sample for band 7. Mero IELTS consists other information too regarding IELTS Writing Task 1, IELTS Listening, IELTS Reading, IELTS Speaking. Below are the some links to the page which might be useful to a student.
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- IELTS Essay Evaluation Online Free
- IELTS Writing Task 2 Recent Questions
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