This page consists the IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Answer Band 8 with Examiner feedback which will help you understanding the tactic to solve the IELTS Writing Task 2 Questions.
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Write about the following topic:
In many countries today, there are concerns about the unhealthy lifestyles that people lead. What health issues are linked to modern lifestyles? What answers to these problems can you suggest?
Include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience to back up your answer.
Write a minimum of 250 words.
Sample Band 8 Answer
In recent times ,many people across the world are worried about their sedentary style of life. This undesired change is believed to be the precursor of physical as well as psychological afflictions. However , the solution to these issues demand collective efforts on individual and government level.
To begin, there are some horrible outcomes associated with modern lifestyle. First of all, people nowadays are busy more than ever, such as in offices and business sectors. Owing to prolonged working hours , they actually cannot get time to do some exercise or relax. Therefore, becoming physically unfit seems inevitable. Furthermore, lack of healthy outdoor activities makes them liable to stress and anxiety, which often ultimately leads to depression.
However ,the dangers of modern lifestyle can be effectively dealt with if both citizens and state are wary of its negative ramifications. Firstly, it would be quite prudent if workers schedule their time giving an importance to physical activities. To illustrate , according to some studies 15 minutes of exercise a day would be sufficient to counteract some health issues, such as cardiac and cerebrovascular diseases.Also, these simple steps seem to be enough in fighting with mental issues by keeping people engaged in healthy activities. Moreover , ruling authorities should introduce certain legislation to encourage regular exercise among people. Employees should not be allowed to work beyond 6 hours or 4 days a week. By taking these measures the above mentioned problems can easily be solved.
To conclude, it is undeniable that advancements in lifestyle have brought some crucial issues for humanity. Nevertheless , these problems should be addressed by the combined action of government and people.
(271Words)
This is the answer is written by the real student who appeared on IELTS exam and got band 8 for this answer. now, let’s us look forward to the essay feedback given by the IELTS Examiner.
Examiner Feedback
Where is this question from please? I feel it encourages description rather than explanation/discussion. I also feel the feedback I am giving is of very little value. You are a doctor so of course all aspects of this answer should be strong. TA – therecould be more detail – “certain legislation” // CC – why “To begin with”? I feel this is borderline because you use a lot of basic conjunctions, However, there is evidence of helpful cohesion// LR – a few terms are not ‘natural’ native speaker word choices ( sedentary style of life/undesired change/advancements in lifestyle/etc)// G – there are a couple of article errors but not enough to limit the band. I’d like more evidence of complex sentence patterns
So, I’d say:
//TA – 8
// CC – 7 (just)
// LR – 8
// G – 8
//Overall = 8.0. Now write something unrelated to medicine.
Well, this are the essay sample for band 8. Mero IELTS consists other information too regarding IELTS Writing Task 1, IELTS Listening, IELTS Reading, IELTS Speaking. Below are the some links to the page which might be useful to a student.
- What is IELTS?
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- IELTS Essay Evaluation Online Free
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- Overall Band Score Calculator
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