This page consists the IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Answer Band 8 with Examiner feedback which will help you understanding the tactic to solve the IELTS Writing Task 2 Questions.
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Write about the following topic:
Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with the above statement?
Include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience to back up your answer.
Write a minimum of 250 words.
Sample Band 8 Answer
In todays world, use of automobiles for traveling and transport is ever increasing, which is also responsible for traffic congestion and pollution. Some are of the view that, raising price of petrol is the best solution however, i firmly disagree with this as this model will not work and there are better alternatives to cope with this problem.
(para 1)Increasing tax on fossil fuel cannot help in solving growing traffic and pollution related hazards because mostly the people who use vehicles for traveling belongs to the upper income class so, certainly this does not seems to be working in long term. This in turn means that, more money for fuel is not going to pursue them to stop employing cars for their personal use hence, this traffic congestion and air pollution will remain a major hurdle, which would thus seem to justify that further taxation measures on petrol will not discourage automobile users and therefore, other steps should be taken.
(Para 2) Nevertheless, policy makers should promote other alternatives, if they want to see fruitful results in the future for both the environment and reducing traffic. There are solutions which are providing mutualistic benefits to both governments and individuals. For instance, if the example of Sweden is taken, this country enacts the use of electrical vehicles by providing free charging spots for these cars, along with reduction of prices for these automobiles. This has consequently, lead to significant decline in carbon dioxide emissions by at least fifty percent. In addition, nations can also cope with growing traffic by providing cheap and environmentally friendly public transport facilities to their citizens such as, Japan, which has shown a remarkable decrease in car ownership in this country thus, advantageous in mitigating pollution and traffic congestion.
(conclusion)Having discussed reasons why other policies are more effective in reducing pollution and traffic, in my opinion, eco- friendly vehicles and better public transport are far superior in solving these problems instead of more tax on fuel, which is not feasible due to the affordability of most consumers.
(337Words)
This is the answer is written by the real student who appeared on IELTS exam and got band 8 for this answer. now, let’s us look forward to the essay feedback given by the IELTS Examiner.
Examiner Feedback
TA – you deal with the question well (though it is quite an easy q). The response could be developed further by being specific regarding where you are writing about (belongs to the upper income class – not wholly true in every part of the world)// CC – only 2 sentences in para 1? But there is excellent cohesion n it//LR – can you tell me why I like this so much? And which phrase prevents you from getting 9;// G – I regard travelling/travel as a grammar error, not vocabulary. There is one noticeable slip in para 2 but in para 1 the punctuation is perhaps adventurous and belongs to the upper income class makes 9 impossible. What happened? So, Id say: TA – 8// CC – 7 (with a little polish 8+ is possible)// LR – 8// G – 8// = 8.0.
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