This page consists the IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Answer Band 7 with Examiner feedback which will help you understanding the tactic to solve the IELTS Writing Task 2 Questions.
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Write about the following topic:
In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience to back up your answer.
Write a minimum of 250 words.
Sample Band 7 Answer
Some people believe that there should be very fast trains available between different cities for travelling therefore it is very important to spend large amount of money on constructing new railway lines. Whereas, other people think that improving current public transport services should be the priority. In this essay, I will discuss both of these opposing views in detail for the better understanding of both asserted statements coupled with clear examples to reach a reasonable conclusion.
The first view is about constructing new railway lines for the very fast trains between cities. Nowadays, most of the people prefer travelling through trains due to several reasons. Some of those reasons are that travelling through trains is easy and comfortable, it takes less time to reach destination and also there is no traffic problem while travelling through trains. Due to these advantages people prefer railways construction because improving existing public transport will not be more helpful as usually public transport is owned by private people and they don’t move the transport until there are enough customers whereas trains are always on time.
On the other side, spending all the money on constructing railways is not considered a good option for some people. They believe that the money should be spent in order to improve public transport that is already available. Trains can not be there every time, for example if a person books a train or miss a train he has to wait for long hours for the train to arrive whereas public transport is always available whenever we want. For travelling in some emergency public transport is considered a priority. This is why people want more money to be spent on improving public transportation.
In the end, I personally think that public transportation system is more reliable and it is always easily available where as travelling through trains requires booking seats and other formalities. Even though, travelling in a train is more comfortable but public transport is always readily available.
(326Words)
This is the answer is written by the real student who appeared on IELTS exam and got band 7 for this answer. now, let’s us look forward to the essay feedback given by the IELTS Examiner.
Examiner Feedback
The introduction is “good” until you use the phrase “a reasonable conclusion”. What does that mean” TA – the essay starts well with para 2 but para 3 is much to ‘general’. The way you use “public transportation system” in the conclusion is confusing because trains are part of the public transportation system.// CC – “In the end”? There is a sense of development and good use of cohesion// LR – I felt the use of collocation was weak until the conclusion. Perhaps the use of carrier nouns would help// G – don’t use contractions. At first glance, grammar looks very strong but there are a few careless slips (if a person books a train or miss a train/the people prefer travelling through trains /etc), some faulty punctuation & you make the common error of using “though” & “but” in the same system
So, I’d say:
//TA – 6
//CC – 7
// LR – 7 (‘just’)
// G – 7
//Overall = 7.0.
Well, this are the essay sample for band 7. Mero IELTS consists other information too regarding IELTS Writing Task 1, IELTS Listening, IELTS Reading, IELTS Speaking. Below are the some links to the page which might be useful to a student.
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