This page consists the IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Answer Band 7 with Examiner feedback which will help you understanding the tactic to solve the IELTS Writing Task 2 Questions.
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Write about the following topic:
As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual’s wellbeing. What factors contribute to job satisfaction? How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?
Include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience to back up your answer.
Write a minimum of 250 words.
Sample Band 7 Answer
Workplaces have now become the places where many adults spend significant proportions of their time at, thus making a sense of job fulfillment the core component of people’s welfare. This essay will provide key aspects leading to job satisfaction and suggest that ensuring the entire workforce is content with their jobs is practically impossible.
There are a large number of crucial factors contributing to the job fulfillment. The main one is the amount of wage people receive for what they do, which is markedly different in various positions. In other words, if it were not for a handsome salary, most of the employees would have already ended up leaving their jobs. Apart from this, it is vitally important to provide workers with different types of bonuses, extra perks for what they have done, with a view to boosting their productivity. For example, people could be given more holiday entitlements to have a proper relaxation that is necessary for coping with a giant boatload of work in their offices. Thus, a clear link between these aspects of work and the job satisfaction can be seen.
However, it is noteworthy that it seems unrealistic for all workers to have a contentment with their jobs. The main reason for this view is that the job fulfillment, if considering the labor force in a single company, cannot be reached on account of a wide gap between the amounts of the salary of workers. As a pay parity does not exist in the mass of companies, this will not act as an incentive to clear up their heavy workloads. As a consequence, workers cannot expect the pay rise which has evidently become a pipe dream and it would feel as if they were being used as a sweated labor. Therefore, it is impossible to have a general satisfaction from a job for the whole workforce.
In the light of these facts, one can conclude that the success of a particular workplace hinges on the productivity of workers which can be achieved by the high amount of salaries and perquisites. However, the sense of job satisfaction cannot prevail among all workers because of the income inequality.
(357Words)
This is the answer is written by the real student who appeared on IELTS exam and got band 7 for this answer. now, let’s us look forward to the essay feedback given by the IELTS Examiner.
Examiner Feedback
The ‘and’ in your thesis statement doesn’t ‘fit’. Wouldn’t “yet” make more sense? TA – you answer the question confidently but there is a flaw to your argument, namely “salary” isn’t a key feature of “job satisfaction”. The aim of the question is to get you to think of other motivating factors other than money, Think of the people who willingly drop down the pay scale for ‘job satisfaction’. I don’t know if it is the same as your cultural setting as mine because you don’t say which culture/country you are writing about. So the reader has to make assumptions// CC – there is a ‘flow’ to the writing// LR – “a giant boatload of work” – I’ve never, ever seen this expression before. Where does it come from? (I know ” a boatload of monkeys”). In contrast, “pipe dream” & “pay parity” can only come from reading The Guardian!// G – there are slips in articles & countable/uncountable nouns
So, I’d say:
// TA – 6 (I considered 5 but have given you the benefit of doubt. You make assumptions without helping/explaining to the reader)
// CC – 7 (could be 8)
// LR – 8 (a whisker from 9)
// G – 8 (9 if the examiner thinks the slips could be made by a native speaker but I wouldn’t say so)
//Overall = 7.0.
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