This page consists the IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Answer Band 7 with Examiner feedback which will help you understanding the tactic to solve the IELTS Writing Task 2 Questions.
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Write about the following topic:
At the present time the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of old people. Do the situation outweigh the disadvantages. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience to back up your answer.
Write a minimum of 250 words.
Sample Band 7 Answer
In recent years, world population is effected to a large extent where mortality ratio of young people have declined significantly this in turn caused the rise of adult population while the population of older people have relatively decreased compared to the past.
Youngsters and adults are considered to be the spine of a nation. They are active and filled with enthusiasm when it comes to work for a country middle aged people are always preferred in every field because the amount of hard work they put in is always justified. For instance, civil services of my country have an age limit to appoint so they can train their officers without any hurdle. Moreover, adolescent are usually observed getting involved in welfare work and social campaigns which helps in prosperity of a nation.
Some others contested that longevity of older people is a need of time where youth have forgotten their values and do not follow their peers. In this era if older people lives longer they can promote the culture and values to the next generations. For example due to the fast paced lifestyle of today’s youth they don’t interact with their elders this is the reason why many traditions are dying. In addition to this having our forefathers with us is a blessing we can ask for their expert advices because of the experience.
In my opinion increment in the ratio of adults have found to be more beneficial, because they help running the engine of a nation in a great manner by providing every effort needed.
(255Words)
This is the answer is written by the real student who appeared on IELTS exam and got band 7 for this answer. now, let’s us look forward to the essay feedback given by the IELTS Examiner.
Examiner Feedback
This is another ‘odd’ question. Where is it from, please? TA – how does the introduction help the reader? Your answer is quite general and the examples could be developed further. I considered 7 but I don’t understand the conclusion (increment in the ratio of adults have found to be more beneficial, – young or old adults? and in para 2 you muddle ‘middle-aged’ & young// CC – cohesion is quite limited but there is a sense of development// LR – this a strength.// G – don’t use contractions (“don’t”). articles & countable/uncountable nouns are problem areas. Verb patterns are mostly correct . Do you feel you have used a wide variety of grammar patterns? Minor punctuation slips
So, I’d say:
//TA – 6
// CC – 7
// LR – 8 (style is too erratic for 9)
// G – 7
//Overall = 7.0.
Well, this are the essay sample for band 7. Mero IELTS consists other information too regarding IELTS Writing Task 1, IELTS Listening, IELTS Reading, IELTS Speaking. Below are the some links to the page which might be useful to a student.
- What is IELTS?
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- IELTS Essay Evaluation Online Free
- IELTS Writing Task 2 Recent Questions
- IELTS Mock Test British Council
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